This course will take you by the hand and walk you step-by-step through the discovery of all of the different ways that you create a sense of self, identifying with aspects of experience, while creating unnecessary suffering for yourself. It also gives you hundreds of practical tools to weaken that identification in the moment when it is happening. Work slowly, doing no more than one lesson every few days, leaving time for integration. This is powerful material, and it can be life-changing.
Dissolve Identification With Self Course
The First Fetter is our primary illusion of being a separate, inherently existing self. This has various different facets, which is why it can take so long for people to explore, get a feel for, and eventually see through it. The First Fetter encompasses all of our identification with thoughts, the body, and the narrative self. Essentially everything we think of as being "me" or "mine" gets addressed here. This also ties into long-standing beliefs about the self which need to be investigated and dispelled, such as the idea that we have free will, can make choices, claim total responsibility for anything, and instigate volitional action.
This is the fetter that most of us spend the most time investigating because it is foundational to how we experience ourselves and everyone else. It is ingrained in every aspect of our daily life, including our language ("I am hungry," "I'm decorating my house," etc.) and the very laws of society that reinforce each person's individuality and ability to act freely and responsibly. Most of us don't even know what it actually means to feel like a self, we just do, so that's generally the best place to start your investigation.
In this course you will get all the material you need to see through the delusion of a separate self.
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Lesson 1: Introduction to the 10 Fetters
There are countless ways that we each identify throughout the day, and it’s possible for all of this to be exposed and seen through when we are made aware that these more subtle identities are still in operation.
There are countless ways that we each identify throughout the day, and it’s possible for all of this to be exposed and seen through when we are made aware that these more subtle identities are still in operation.
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Lesson 2: Our Approach
All 10 Fetters are visible at different points of each day. We are not just cycling across the wheel over months and years, we are also cycling through them minute to minute. It is like fractals of identification.
All 10 Fetters are visible at different points of each day. We are not just cycling across the wheel over months and years, we are also cycling through them minute to minute. It is like fractals of identification.
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Lesson 3: Why The Fetters?
Many people from all different traditions around the globe and throughout time have had experiences that sound like what we refer to as having seen through the First Fetter. Suddenly the feeling of being “me” which was so prevalent in life that it was never questioned, falls away, and things feel markedly different for a while.
Many people from all different traditions around the globe and throughout time have had experiences that sound like what we refer to as having seen through the First Fetter. Suddenly the feeling of being “me” which was so prevalent in life that it was never questioned, falls away, and things feel markedly different for a while.
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Lesson 1: "Who am I?"
The First Fetter is the delusion which makes us see ourselves as a separate self. A consistent, knowable being that extends across time, possibly even transcending the death of the body.
The First Fetter is the delusion which makes us see ourselves as a separate self. A consistent, knowable being that extends across time, possibly even transcending the death of the body.
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Lesson 2: Fetter Model Overview
We use the Fetters, not as a step-wise ladder, but instead as a wheel (The Wheel of Identification) which we keep cycling through, from spoke to spoke, at different points throughout each day.
We use the Fetters, not as a step-wise ladder, but instead as a wheel (The Wheel of Identification) which we keep cycling through, from spoke to spoke, at different points throughout each day.
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Lesson 3: Selfing Vs Reality
"Selfing" is the mental process that creates an illusory "I" in the metaphorical center of our concern, and in the literal center of our perceptual field. It’s that feeling most of us have never questioned that "I am here", because nearly everything we do reinforces this assertion.
"Selfing" is the mental process that creates an illusory "I" in the metaphorical center of our concern, and in the literal center of our perceptual field. It’s that feeling most of us have never questioned that "I am here", because nearly everything we do reinforces this assertion.
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Lesson 4: Practice Tools
We recommend employing a wide range of different inquiry styles, depending on which illusion we are attempting to see through, or which insight we are attempting to uncover.
We recommend employing a wide range of different inquiry styles, depending on which illusion we are attempting to see through, or which insight we are attempting to uncover.
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Lesson 5: The Importance of Group Work
Our individual practice can be hindered because of our undiscovered blind spots. We all have them. There are aspects of our behavior and programming that none of us are privy to, no matter how self-aware and awake we might be.
Our individual practice can be hindered because of our undiscovered blind spots. We all have them. There are aspects of our behavior and programming that none of us are privy to, no matter how self-aware and awake we might be.
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Lesson 6: Important Concepts We Will Be Discussing
Awakening is not about becoming someone new, but instead seeing through the illusion of "someone" altogether.
Awakening is not about becoming someone new, but instead seeing through the illusion of "someone" altogether.
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Lesson 7: Practice Assignments
Check in daily at different times: "Am I in reality or fantasy right now?" Then ground yourself: Return to sensory reality. ("What do I feel in my hands/feet right now?").
Check in daily at different times: "Am I in reality or fantasy right now?" Then ground yourself: Return to sensory reality. ("What do I feel in my hands/feet right now?").
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Lesson 8: Potential Obstacles to Be Aware Of
Spiritual bypassing is when we use cherry-picked concepts to avoid needing to feel something unpleasant.
Spiritual bypassing is when we use cherry-picked concepts to avoid needing to feel something unpleasant.
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Lesson 9: Progress Markers
Remember that Awakening isn’t linear. Expect to encounter irregular cycles of clarity and confusion. It can be helpful to periodically revisit earlier lessons. Each fetter illuminates the others. Deeper layers reveal themselves over time, so keep coming back to material that you believe you've fully understood and integrated. There is likely something more for you to discover.
Remember that Awakening isn’t linear. Expect to encounter irregular cycles of clarity and confusion. It can be helpful to periodically revisit earlier lessons. Each fetter illuminates the others. Deeper layers reveal themselves over time, so keep coming back to material that you believe you've fully understood and integrated. There is likely something more for you to discover.
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Lesson 10: Final Notes and Thoughts
These lessons are layered. We recommend revisiting them again and again as your understanding deepens. You will hear things you will swear you've never heard before, and understand things in a different way that wasn't available to you the first time through.
These lessons are layered. We recommend revisiting them again and again as your understanding deepens. You will hear things you will swear you've never heard before, and understand things in a different way that wasn't available to you the first time through.
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Lesson 11: Mantra for Integration
A useful mantra for integration. Save the text and image on your phone and have it as a reminder.
A useful mantra for integration. Save the text and image on your phone and have it as a reminder.
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Lesson 1: Fragments of a Self - Guided Meditation
‘Wow Todd!! Totally fabulous. It was so clear that there was no ability to be a doer doing anything. There simply was a moving of attention when it moved not facilitated by anything accept maybe intuitive interest in engaging in the meditation. At some point it was difficult to differentiate between the sensations in the face as separate from the belly. They merged. Just brilliant guiding.’
‘Wow Todd!! Totally fabulous. It was so clear that there was no ability to be a doer doing anything. There simply was a moving of attention when it moved not facilitated by anything accept maybe intuitive interest in engaging in the meditation. At some point it was difficult to differentiate between the sensations in the face as separate from the belly. They merged. Just brilliant guiding.’
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10 Introspective Pointers
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Lesson 1: 1st Fetter Introduction
The First Fetter is the delusion which makes us see ourselves as a separate self. A consistent, knowable being that extends across time, possibly even transcending the death of the body.
The First Fetter is the delusion which makes us see ourselves as a separate self. A consistent, knowable being that extends across time, possibly even transcending the death of the body.
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Lesson 2: Webs of Connectivity
We create a sense of "I" within each of those stories that we believe about what is "me, myself, and mine". This sense of “I” defines itself by comparison. It needs to decide what part of this experience is "me and mine" and what parts are "other". This has some practical implications, but largely it's an arbitrary distinction that gets created.
We create a sense of "I" within each of those stories that we believe about what is "me, myself, and mine". This sense of “I” defines itself by comparison. It needs to decide what part of this experience is "me and mine" and what parts are "other". This has some practical implications, but largely it's an arbitrary distinction that gets created.
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Lesson 3: What am I?
Let’s start at the beginning. Feel into reality. Again, by “reality” we mean whatever is appearing in your sense fields without any labels attached to it. There can be seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, and touching/feeling but can there be the simple action of awareness without there being a thought about what it is that is being seen, heard, smelled, tasted or felt?
Let’s start at the beginning. Feel into reality. Again, by “reality” we mean whatever is appearing in your sense fields without any labels attached to it. There can be seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, and touching/feeling but can there be the simple action of awareness without there being a thought about what it is that is being seen, heard, smelled, tasted or felt?
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Lesson 4: Am I the Body?
If you reflect a bit, you will notice that there is likely a distance between the feeling of being the experiencer, and that which is being experienced. In short, this is the "me" vs "them" phenomenon. The root of the delusion of duality.
If you reflect a bit, you will notice that there is likely a distance between the feeling of being the experiencer, and that which is being experienced. In short, this is the "me" vs "them" phenomenon. The root of the delusion of duality.
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Lesson 5: Am I My Thoughts
Maybe you think that the personal “I” is in the mind. That seems reasonable. We often take our thoughts to be "my thoughts" and to be a direct reflection of "who I am" and "what I know and believe". This assumption, however, is calling out for deeper investigation.
Maybe you think that the personal “I” is in the mind. That seems reasonable. We often take our thoughts to be "my thoughts" and to be a direct reflection of "who I am" and "what I know and believe". This assumption, however, is calling out for deeper investigation.
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Lesson 6: The Diversion of Consciousness
The familiar attempt of the mind to identify, make sense of, and create meaning out disconnected sensations and thoughts, drawing connections where there often aren't any to be found, is how we end up harboring a cadre of beliefs that we can never prove, be they spiritual, political, social, or personal.
The familiar attempt of the mind to identify, make sense of, and create meaning out disconnected sensations and thoughts, drawing connections where there often aren't any to be found, is how we end up harboring a cadre of beliefs that we can never prove, be they spiritual, political, social, or personal.
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Lesson 7: Is This Real?
The ears are hearing, the nose is smelling, the eyes are seeing, the mouth is tasting, the body is feeling, and the mind is doing all five of these things on a slightly more subtle, but still discernible level.
That is what, for now, we will call “reality”.The ears are hearing, the nose is smelling, the eyes are seeing, the mouth is tasting, the body is feeling, and the mind is doing all five of these things on a slightly more subtle, but still discernible level.
That is what, for now, we will call “reality”. -
Lesson 8: The Illusion of the Separate Self
The "Self" is a Delusion: The belief in a separate, individual "I" is a constructed story, not reality. It cannot be found outside of thoughts about it, or conceptualizations of it.
The "Self" is a Delusion: The belief in a separate, individual "I" is a constructed story, not reality. It cannot be found outside of thoughts about it, or conceptualizations of it.
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Lesson 9: 10 Point Summary for Curious Inquiry
Every thought about "you", your identity, past history, opinions, cherished beliefs, and judgments, are all just mental constructs.
Every thought about "you", your identity, past history, opinions, cherished beliefs, and judgments, are all just mental constructs.
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Lesson 10: The Liberation of Seeing Through the Self
Dismantling the First Fetter, the illusion of a separate, enduring "I", is not about acquiring new knowledge. We must instead unlearn the stories and conceptual overlays that we’ve mistaken for reality.
Dismantling the First Fetter, the illusion of a separate, enduring "I", is not about acquiring new knowledge. We must instead unlearn the stories and conceptual overlays that we’ve mistaken for reality.
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Lesson 1: The "I am a Thought" Meditation
“Wow. This is amazing. I became the sensation. The sensation was/is everything. I’ve done this 3 times now with the same results each time. Amazing. Thank you!”
“Wow. This is amazing. I became the sensation. The sensation was/is everything. I’ve done this 3 times now with the same results each time. Amazing. Thank you!”
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Lesson 1: The Foundational Triangle - Guided Session
“This is so helpful, thank you! Would have kept myself ‘stuck’ at the 1st fetter ‘level’ if not for this video.”
“This is so helpful, thank you! Would have kept myself ‘stuck’ at the 1st fetter ‘level’ if not for this video.”
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Lesson 2: Discussion Summary of the Foundational Triangle
The First Fetter (identity) is reinforced by the Second Fetter emotions (shame, fear) that seem to define something about that self. ("I am a shameful person who always mistreats people.") The Third Fetter (rituals/habits) distracts from feeling, or tries to "fix" the emotions of the Second.
The First Fetter (identity) is reinforced by the Second Fetter emotions (shame, fear) that seem to define something about that self. ("I am a shameful person who always mistreats people.") The Third Fetter (rituals/habits) distracts from feeling, or tries to "fix" the emotions of the Second.
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Lesson 3: 10 Introspective Pointers
How to Use These Inquiries; Pick one question daily. Let it linger in the background, checking in with it periodically; observe how it colors your experience when you put it into practice.
How to Use These Inquiries; Pick one question daily. Let it linger in the background, checking in with it periodically; observe how it colors your experience when you put it into practice.
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Lesson 1: You Are Always Self-Referential
‘Just starting out with these, you point so directly. Thank you so much for doing this.’
‘Just starting out with these, you point so directly. Thank you so much for doing this.’
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Lesson 2: The Nature of Ego (Selfing)
The "I" (Ego) is a delusion that places itself in the center of all experiences, constantly judging, comparing, and assuming. It's not wrong; it serves an evolutionary purpose. But it also causes a lot of suffering when left unchecked. These practices help to find a balance between functionality and relief from delusion.
The "I" (Ego) is a delusion that places itself in the center of all experiences, constantly judging, comparing, and assuming. It's not wrong; it serves an evolutionary purpose. But it also causes a lot of suffering when left unchecked. These practices help to find a balance between functionality and relief from delusion.
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Lesson 3: Thoughts Vs Reality
We talk a lot about thoughts, and the distinction between thoughts and reality, because it is arguably the most important distinction we can make to see through most illusions on this path.
We talk a lot about thoughts, and the distinction between thoughts and reality, because it is arguably the most important distinction we can make to see through most illusions on this path.
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Lesson 4: The Role of Silence or Stillness
The Role of Silence or Stillness. Insights arise when you stop the active thinking and allow silence or stillness to settle in. Note: There is a difference between active and passive thinking.
The Role of Silence or Stillness. Insights arise when you stop the active thinking and allow silence or stillness to settle in. Note: There is a difference between active and passive thinking.
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Lesson 5: Distinguish Between Reaction and Response
Most internal dialogue is just theater playing out for the Ego. We prepare replies in advance, defend and become ever more rigid in our beliefs, all the while reinforcing the sense of the "I" who needs to be prepared, defended, and feel right.
Most internal dialogue is just theater playing out for the Ego. We prepare replies in advance, defend and become ever more rigid in our beliefs, all the while reinforcing the sense of the "I" who needs to be prepared, defended, and feel right.
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Lesson 6: Practical Exercises for Awareness
This journey isn’t likely to end in the achievement of a final "awakened" state where life is perfect and eternally blissful. We are simply learning to peel back layers of delusion, one Fetter at a time. The moment that you think "I get it" is the moment you should pause and check in; there is nothing to "get" and no one to "get it". So who is this thought referring to?
This journey isn’t likely to end in the achievement of a final "awakened" state where life is perfect and eternally blissful. We are simply learning to peel back layers of delusion, one Fetter at a time. The moment that you think "I get it" is the moment you should pause and check in; there is nothing to "get" and no one to "get it". So who is this thought referring to?
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Lesson 7: The Bigger Picture
The Fetters are a map, but they are not the territory. They merely point to certain ways in which many of us tend to identify with experience, and the ways in which that identification causes so much suffering for ourselves and for others.
The Fetters are a map, but they are not the territory. They merely point to certain ways in which many of us tend to identify with experience, and the ways in which that identification causes so much suffering for ourselves and for others.
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10 (amazing!) Introspective Pointers For Everyday Insight.
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Lesson 1: A Crash Course in Awakening
“Even after seeing that there is no permanent, unchanging, separate self, some residual sense of a self still remains. I think I’ve been misidentifying awareness/consciousness as that residual sense of a self/witness/perceiver and somehow trying to separate the contents of awareness into not-self.”
“Even after seeing that there is no permanent, unchanging, separate self, some residual sense of a self still remains. I think I’ve been misidentifying awareness/consciousness as that residual sense of a self/witness/perceiver and somehow trying to separate the contents of awareness into not-self.”
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Lesson 2: The Liberating Illusion of Choice
Whatever feels like conscious decision-making (i.e. choosing to browse iPhone cases instead of meditating) is the direct outcome of subconscious impulses, not the workings of a sovereign self.
Whatever feels like conscious decision-making (i.e. choosing to browse iPhone cases instead of meditating) is the direct outcome of subconscious impulses, not the workings of a sovereign self.
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Lesson 3: Practical Inquiry Tools
Though there's nothing inherently wrong with belief, when we live from a place of abstract thought and conceptualization instead of engaging directly with what is appearing in front of us now, we are easily led by the mind into creating all sorts of judgments which spark desires and aversions. And these end up initiating untold suffering for us, and for those around us.
Though there's nothing inherently wrong with belief, when we live from a place of abstract thought and conceptualization instead of engaging directly with what is appearing in front of us now, we are easily led by the mind into creating all sorts of judgments which spark desires and aversions. And these end up initiating untold suffering for us, and for those around us.
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Lesson 4: Notes From This Lesson
What we experience as "myself" in daily life is as much of a mirage as mistaking shimmering heat lines in the desert as an oasis. We constantly experience thoughts (which may appear in any of the five mental sense faculties) and we constantly experience sensations in the body.
What we experience as "myself" in daily life is as much of a mirage as mistaking shimmering heat lines in the desert as an oasis. We constantly experience thoughts (which may appear in any of the five mental sense faculties) and we constantly experience sensations in the body.
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Lesson 5: Life Without the Illusion
The recognition of the limits of our ability to foresee future consequences can lead us to develop an instantaneous humility that keeps us from unnecessarily agonizing over things that are beyond our ability to know or control.
The recognition of the limits of our ability to foresee future consequences can lead us to develop an instantaneous humility that keeps us from unnecessarily agonizing over things that are beyond our ability to know or control.
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Lesson 6: You Are Not Losing Control
Remember, you’re not losing, or giving away your control. This practice is about discovering that "you" never had, or needed it to begin with.
Remember, you’re not losing, or giving away your control. This practice is about discovering that "you" never had, or needed it to begin with.
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Lesson 1: Investigation and Realization
This poem dramatizes what it's like to do self inquiry practice, and the potential experiences that happen during and after it. See if you can follow along with the inquiry that is being described in the poem, pause to experiment, and experience it for yourself. And see if you discover any of the same conclusions as the person in the poem.
This poem dramatizes what it's like to do self inquiry practice, and the potential experiences that happen during and after it. See if you can follow along with the inquiry that is being described in the poem, pause to experiment, and experience it for yourself. And see if you discover any of the same conclusions as the person in the poem.
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Lesson 1: Trauma and Expectation
“I really enjoyed watching this again. So many things have become much clearer. You are absolutely right. Things have a way of popping into your life and suddenly realize, oh yes, I’ve been there.”
“I really enjoyed watching this again. So many things have become much clearer. You are absolutely right. Things have a way of popping into your life and suddenly realize, oh yes, I’ve been there.”
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Lesson 2: Key Insights: Being vs Thinking
Selfing pulls us either into the past (with regrets or resentments) or the future (with expectations or anxieties), making it hard to remain present. The mind is always thinking about something. And this creates the sense of an "I" at the center of experience.
Selfing pulls us either into the past (with regrets or resentments) or the future (with expectations or anxieties), making it hard to remain present. The mind is always thinking about something. And this creates the sense of an "I" at the center of experience.
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Lesson 3: Feelings vs Emotions
You cannot have an emotion without both sensations and thoughts being present. The thoughts define and give meaning to the sensations in a predictable way, and the sensations give tactile embodiment and substance to ephemeral thoughts.
You cannot have an emotion without both sensations and thoughts being present. The thoughts define and give meaning to the sensations in a predictable way, and the sensations give tactile embodiment and substance to ephemeral thoughts.
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A Pocket Guide to Approaching Hardship.
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Lesson 4: Expectations and Victimhood
Expectations are a belief that a future moment might conform perfectly with your projections and wishes of how it might turn out. As we can all attest, this is rarely ever the case. Our lives are filled with missed trains and unmet relationship goals.
Expectations are a belief that a future moment might conform perfectly with your projections and wishes of how it might turn out. As we can all attest, this is rarely ever the case. Our lives are filled with missed trains and unmet relationship goals.
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There are Three basic Steps to working with all Trauma.
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Conclusion And Final Questions For Reflection.
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Lesson 7: 10 Introspective Pointers
10 Deep Introspective Pointers: Pick one pointer per day. Work with it multiple times throughout the day. Notice how this awareness colors your interactions with others, and your way of viewing events of the day.
10 Deep Introspective Pointers: Pick one pointer per day. Work with it multiple times throughout the day. Notice how this awareness colors your interactions with others, and your way of viewing events of the day.
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Lesson 1: "Who is the Meditator?" - Guided Inquiry
“Fantastic! There is this subtle movements of the eyes, tension in the muscles around eyes, and even the tongue and forehead when attention moves and straining to think and figure out. Will have to do this a few more times! And that sensation in the head which is referenced to keep other sensations at a distance.”
“Fantastic! There is this subtle movements of the eyes, tension in the muscles around eyes, and even the tongue and forehead when attention moves and straining to think and figure out. Will have to do this a few more times! And that sensation in the head which is referenced to keep other sensations at a distance.”
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Lesson 2: 10 Pointers to Dissolve the Perception of Doing
By repeatedly doing this practice, even when you believe you know the outcome, you can discover all of the assumptions that are constructing the illusion of a separate self as it happens in real time. Seeing through this illusion alone starts to limit its ability to keep you bound to a life of suffering.
By repeatedly doing this practice, even when you believe you know the outcome, you can discover all of the assumptions that are constructing the illusion of a separate self as it happens in real time. Seeing through this illusion alone starts to limit its ability to keep you bound to a life of suffering.
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Lesson 1: Ego Death - Part 1
“I’m so amazed by these lessons... I already feel shifts happening. I had a pretty big awakening in 2015 about thought- seeing it’s not me and I saw (maybe felt more accurately) my true nature... everything was different after that, and much peace.. but since then more and more thoughts have crept back in and I’ve become so identified again. Thank you so much for these wonderful messages. 💗”
“I’m so amazed by these lessons... I already feel shifts happening. I had a pretty big awakening in 2015 about thought- seeing it’s not me and I saw (maybe felt more accurately) my true nature... everything was different after that, and much peace.. but since then more and more thoughts have crept back in and I’ve become so identified again. Thank you so much for these wonderful messages. 💗”
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Lesson 2: Question Everything
The most important takeaway from not only this lesson, but the whole Awakening Curriculum itself, is: Be curious about everything and question all of your assumptions.
The most important takeaway from not only this lesson, but the whole Awakening Curriculum itself, is: Be curious about everything and question all of your assumptions.
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Lesson 3: Identification and Assumptions
Identification is the root of all suffering. Anger, pride, fear, and all the rest of the emotions that cause our suffering arise from believing in an unchanging self that owns things ("My car"), holds opinions ("I’m right about that!"), or reacts to life ("They shouldn't have spoken to me like that...").
Identification is the root of all suffering. Anger, pride, fear, and all the rest of the emotions that cause our suffering arise from believing in an unchanging self that owns things ("My car"), holds opinions ("I’m right about that!"), or reacts to life ("They shouldn't have spoken to me like that...").
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Lesson 4: Thoughts Are Just Thoughts
Thoughts lie. The mind constantly labels experiences, ("that’s a tree," "I’m clumsy") but these are concepts, not reality.
Thoughts lie. The mind constantly labels experiences, ("that’s a tree," "I’m clumsy") but these are concepts, not reality.
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Lesson 5: Awakening Vs Delusion
"Awake nature" is always here, it's just being clouded by movements of mind. You’ve probably heard it a nauseating number of times from countless teachers and seekers alike, but in a very real sense, you are already awake. Enlightenment isn’t a destination. It's not something to achieve or a place to go to.
"Awake nature" is always here, it's just being clouded by movements of mind. You’ve probably heard it a nauseating number of times from countless teachers and seekers alike, but in a very real sense, you are already awake. Enlightenment isn’t a destination. It's not something to achieve or a place to go to.
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Lesson 6: Trauma and Assumptions
Painful events likely happened. We neither need to deny or affirm this. But the story that you have built around them ("I caused this," "it happened because...") is the real wound. Healing means seeing that it was never about you.
Painful events likely happened. We neither need to deny or affirm this. But the story that you have built around them ("I caused this," "it happened because...") is the real wound. Healing means seeing that it was never about you.
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Lesson 7: The Ego's Tricks
Even after the early stages of awakening, the Ego can still cling to more subtle identities like "I’m spiritual now," "I'm awake!" or "I’ve let everything go." To check the Ego assumptions we do The Ego Trick Test.
Even after the early stages of awakening, the Ego can still cling to more subtle identities like "I’m spiritual now," "I'm awake!" or "I’ve let everything go." To check the Ego assumptions we do The Ego Trick Test.
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Lesson 8: Contentment is the Only Truth
Contentment Is the litmus test. If you’re not at peace right this moment, you’re believing a thought, or at the very least, not paying enough attention to what is actually here.
Contentment Is the litmus test. If you’re not at peace right this moment, you’re believing a thought, or at the very least, not paying enough attention to what is actually here.
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Lesson 9: Ego Death & Spiritual Awakening
Ego Death simply means letting go of identification. So Ego Death isn’t scary. Unlike how some teachers might frame it, it's not about vanishing into a dark void, or killing off part of the persona. It’s about dropping the illusion that there is someone at the center of this experience. It’s about seeing that there is no one to control anything.
Ego Death simply means letting go of identification. So Ego Death isn’t scary. Unlike how some teachers might frame it, it's not about vanishing into a dark void, or killing off part of the persona. It’s about dropping the illusion that there is someone at the center of this experience. It’s about seeing that there is no one to control anything.
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Lesson 10: Compassion for the Journey
Awakening will not make you a better, more special person, who has achieved a higher transcendental state. But it will help you to see through the mirage; the thoughts, self-talk, bodily sensations, emotions, conceptual identities, mental images and other assumptions that have been mistaken for "you".
Awakening will not make you a better, more special person, who has achieved a higher transcendental state. But it will help you to see through the mirage; the thoughts, self-talk, bodily sensations, emotions, conceptual identities, mental images and other assumptions that have been mistaken for "you".
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Lesson 11: Final Exercise
When activated/triggered (like in a moment of road rage, or after being insulted), ask yourself: "What is trying to defend or maintain itself?" Then remember, and even say to yourself: "I’m so much more than this."
When activated/triggered (like in a moment of road rage, or after being insulted), ask yourself: "What is trying to defend or maintain itself?" Then remember, and even say to yourself: "I’m so much more than this."
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Lesson 12: 10 Pointers to Check Ego Death
10 Pointers to Check Ego Death. What underlying beliefs are intact? What is still maintained and defended? And why is that?
10 Pointers to Check Ego Death. What underlying beliefs are intact? What is still maintained and defended? And why is that?
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Lesson 1: 'One Lost Shoe That Can Never Drop' Poetic Inquiry
Read this, not just as a poem, but as an inquiry. Take your time with it. Play along with the text. If it asks you to do something, try it. For the sections that aren't directing you towards a specific experience, relax the mind, and allow the text speak to the subconscious, rather than the conscious mind.
Read this, not just as a poem, but as an inquiry. Take your time with it. Play along with the text. If it asks you to do something, try it. For the sections that aren't directing you towards a specific experience, relax the mind, and allow the text speak to the subconscious, rather than the conscious mind.
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Lesson 1: Self-Inquiry Through Hearing in Direct Experience - Anatta Guided Meditation
“This is an improvised meditation from a private guiding group. We explore the sound field to directly experience aural sensations, and try to find the “Hearer/Witness/Observer” that those sounds seem to imply. Enjoy.”
“This is an improvised meditation from a private guiding group. We explore the sound field to directly experience aural sensations, and try to find the “Hearer/Witness/Observer” that those sounds seem to imply. Enjoy.”
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Lesson 2: 10 Introspective Pointers on Hearing. The Breath as an Anchor
10 Introspective Pointers on Hearing. The Breath as an Anchor and a guide to insights.
10 Introspective Pointers on Hearing. The Breath as an Anchor and a guide to insights.
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Lesson 1: Ego Death - Part 2
“You are an angel sent from … somewhere… and I thank you so much for your teachings. I find my Ego shouting in disagreement at everything and it’s quite humorous…”
“You are an angel sent from … somewhere… and I thank you so much for your teachings. I find my Ego shouting in disagreement at everything and it’s quite humorous…”
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Lesson 2: Ego Death and Spiritual Awakening
What "dies" during spiritual awakening isn't the personality, it is the delusional overlay of believing that life is the way that you think it is.
What "dies" during spiritual awakening isn't the personality, it is the delusional overlay of believing that life is the way that you think it is.
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Lesson 3: Letting Go of Control
As we've discussed at length already, the belief in control is a delusion. Life unfolds unpredictably.
As we've discussed at length already, the belief in control is a delusion. Life unfolds unpredictably.
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Lesson 4: Expectations and Victimhood
Every expectation breeds victimhood. We leave ourselves perpetually open to becoming a victim because things rarely go exactly the way that we envision them. If events don’t go "your way," or things don't work out precisely as planned, the ego feels wronged.
Every expectation breeds victimhood. We leave ourselves perpetually open to becoming a victim because things rarely go exactly the way that we envision them. If events don’t go "your way," or things don't work out precisely as planned, the ego feels wronged.
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Lesson 5: The Illusion of Time and Planning
Time is a mental construct. Without the use of the imaginative faculties of the mind, we cannot find a past or a future. They are not evident in our room with us. All we have access to is this particular now, which is always only now.
Time is a mental construct. Without the use of the imaginative faculties of the mind, we cannot find a past or a future. They are not evident in our room with us. All we have access to is this particular now, which is always only now.
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Lesson 6: Death and the Ego's Fear
The Ego is a natural part of the functioning of the mind. It has evolved in order to maintain a feeling of control, agency, and protection for this biological organism.
The Ego is a natural part of the functioning of the mind. It has evolved in order to maintain a feeling of control, agency, and protection for this biological organism.
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Lesson 7: The Joy of Experiencing
Every moment contains the "joy of experiencing" if you pause to notice it. This joy of experiencing is a natural byproduct of a direct, label-free engagement with life. It is what is here, arising, beyond thinking, struggling, striving, wanting, and pushing away.
Every moment contains the "joy of experiencing" if you pause to notice it. This joy of experiencing is a natural byproduct of a direct, label-free engagement with life. It is what is here, arising, beyond thinking, struggling, striving, wanting, and pushing away.
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Lesson 8: The Importance of Silence
Another part of what makes up the self-illusion is the incessant self-talk which reinforces its existence.
Another part of what makes up the self-illusion is the incessant self-talk which reinforces its existence.
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Final Practices & Reflections; As always, Remain Curious.
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Lesson 10: 10 Pointers for Introspection on Ego, Control, and Awakening
10 Pointers for Introspection on Ego, Control, and Awakening. Take one question per day to sit with, investigate, and observe from multiple angles.
10 Pointers for Introspection on Ego, Control, and Awakening. Take one question per day to sit with, investigate, and observe from multiple angles.
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Lesson 1: WARNING! Fear of Death Inquiry - Meditative Inquiry
WARNING! Fear of Death Inquiry - Meditative Inquiry
WARNING! Fear of Death Inquiry - Meditative Inquiry
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Lesson 2: 10 Introspective Pointers on Death, Self, and Fear
10 Introspective Pointers on Death, Self, and Fear.
10 Introspective Pointers on Death, Self, and Fear.
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Lesson 1: Why Thoughts Are Misleading
“I felt something release with this lesson, maybe a subtle layer of belief in thought. It has stunned me—sat here gazing around for ten minutes. I’m at a loss for words…or action.”
“I felt something release with this lesson, maybe a subtle layer of belief in thought. It has stunned me—sat here gazing around for ten minutes. I’m at a loss for words…or action.”
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Lesson 2: Something Out of Nothing
Even when you’ve seen through the idea of a separate self, thoughts can still arise that feel real and personal.
Even when you’ve seen through the idea of a separate self, thoughts can still arise that feel real and personal.
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Lesson 3: The Practice of Awareness
Recall a situation that is charged in such a way that your mind will likely become fixated on a thought around it.
Recall a situation that is charged in such a way that your mind will likely become fixated on a thought around it.
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Lesson 4: Conclusion
All of these thoughts "I’m not enough," "I’m too much," "I should be different," are something made out of nothing. They have no inherent reality, and no objective truth. They are stories, dreams, mirages, just a mind entertaining itself with its own fictions.
All of these thoughts "I’m not enough," "I’m too much," "I should be different," are something made out of nothing. They have no inherent reality, and no objective truth. They are stories, dreams, mirages, just a mind entertaining itself with its own fictions.
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10 Pointers on the Delusion of Thought.
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Lesson 1: There is Only Sensation
“Gosh that was amazing Todd - not only sensing the physical strain in the eye area, but that the entire space is occupied by just the seen....so there is no space for a “seer” 😮.
Will have to do this over again as I feel I am using cognition to come to that conclusion!!!”“Gosh that was amazing Todd - not only sensing the physical strain in the eye area, but that the entire space is occupied by just the seen....so there is no space for a “seer” 😮.
Will have to do this over again as I feel I am using cognition to come to that conclusion!!!” -
Lesson 2: Buddhist Teachings on Sensation and Non-Separation
To experience insights that go beyond the normal processing habits of the mind, it is important that one can maintain attention on the raw sensations in the body e.g., the feeling of feet on the floor, or the sensation of presence behind the eyes without relying on mental images or spatial constructs that take these base sensations and make something completely new out of them.
To experience insights that go beyond the normal processing habits of the mind, it is important that one can maintain attention on the raw sensations in the body e.g., the feeling of feet on the floor, or the sensation of presence behind the eyes without relying on mental images or spatial constructs that take these base sensations and make something completely new out of them.
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Lesson 3: Key Insights and Concepts
The direct experience of physical sensations - no matter where they might arise in the body - reveals that there is no inherent separation between any of them.
The direct experience of physical sensations - no matter where they might arise in the body - reveals that there is no inherent separation between any of them.
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Lesson 4: 10 Introspective Pointers on Sensations and Self
10 Introspective Pointers on Sensations and Self.
10 Introspective Pointers on Sensations and Self.
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Lesson 1: The Reality of Abuse
When someone questions how much of their traumatic experience in an abusive relationship is "real," the answer is clear: it is real. Denial or spiritual bypassing ("Maybe it didn’t happen") is unhelpful!
When someone questions how much of their traumatic experience in an abusive relationship is "real," the answer is clear: it is real. Denial or spiritual bypassing ("Maybe it didn’t happen") is unhelpful!
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Lesson 2: Self-Love is the Antidote
The abuse is forcing us into a painful confrontation with the truth: Love cannot be sourced from the outside, feeling love is an "inside job".
The abuse is forcing us into a painful confrontation with the truth: Love cannot be sourced from the outside, feeling love is an "inside job".
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Lesson 3: The Paradox of Non-Self and Trauma Work
While Buddhism teaches that there is "no separate self," trauma work requires acknowledging the wounded Ego. You can’t transcend what you haven’t faced.
While Buddhism teaches that there is "no separate self," trauma work requires acknowledging the wounded Ego. You can’t transcend what you haven’t faced.
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Lesson 4: Patience and Unconditional Acceptance
Healing is not a linear process.
Impatience, saying to yourself things like "I should be over this by now", is another form of self-judgment.Healing is not a linear process.
Impatience, saying to yourself things like "I should be over this by now", is another form of self-judgment. -
Lesson 5: Practical Steps for Survivors
Often the body is able to release its own traumas when we can turn off the conscious mind with all of its ideas of how healing is supposed to look, and what steps it's supposed to take. The body doesn't know or care about any of that. It only wants to regain a state of homeostasis, harmony and functionality.
Often the body is able to release its own traumas when we can turn off the conscious mind with all of its ideas of how healing is supposed to look, and what steps it's supposed to take. The body doesn't know or care about any of that. It only wants to regain a state of homeostasis, harmony and functionality.
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10 Pointers for Inquiry To Heal From Abuse.
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Lesson 1: PSA - A Narcissism Playbook - Poem for Reflection
“Use this poem as a mirror.
Do you recognize aspects of a current or previous relationship in it?
Does it remind you of someone in particular?
Notice any emotions that it brings up.
If you find yourself in a toxic relationship like this, please consider reaching out for help to groups, shelters, or other resources that can help you to extract yourself from a dangerous, or deeply unhealthy situation.““Use this poem as a mirror.
Do you recognize aspects of a current or previous relationship in it?
Does it remind you of someone in particular?
Notice any emotions that it brings up.
If you find yourself in a toxic relationship like this, please consider reaching out for help to groups, shelters, or other resources that can help you to extract yourself from a dangerous, or deeply unhealthy situation.“
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Lesson 1: Guided Listening and Self-Inquiry Meditation
“For anyone with anxiety issues or sensitivity to sudden loud noises, rest assured that there are none in here. The audio contains suburban street sounds, but nothing meant to scare or surprise the listener. It’s okay to relax and explore your senses in direct experience. Enjoy!”
“For anyone with anxiety issues or sensitivity to sudden loud noises, rest assured that there are none in here. The audio contains suburban street sounds, but nothing meant to scare or surprise the listener. It’s okay to relax and explore your senses in direct experience. Enjoy!”
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Lesson 1: 3 Continents of Awakening
“Thanks, hearing different people talking about the same thing is crucial to demystify it. It’s one of the missing points that has kept me away from it till now, looking at all the enlightened gurus but not seeing the enlightenrd disciples anywhere around them!”
“Thanks, hearing different people talking about the same thing is crucial to demystify it. It’s one of the missing points that has kept me away from it till now, looking at all the enlightened gurus but not seeing the enlightenrd disciples anywhere around them!”
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Lesson 1: Final First Fetter Lesson and Q&A
“Thank you so much Pernille, this is some of the most healing work I’ve encountered in my life. So grateful for your offerings!”
“Thank you so much Pernille, this is some of the most healing work I’ve encountered in my life. So grateful for your offerings!”
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We are so happy that there is now a full course for you to see through the identification of the self!
This course is like a practical handbook of all of the different angles that you need to be aware of when you are investigating identification in your direct experience. We hope that it will be equally useful to people who are absolute beginners on this awakening path, as it will be to seasoned seekers who believe they have seen through the sense of self and are currently working with the higher fetters. We believe that everyone will find things in the course that will help them to deepen their insights regardless of whichever stage of awakening they feel they are in.
Take your time with this course! It is quite comprehensive. Through it we will be discussing many aspects of awakening, some of which tend to be overlooked by those on the path. We stress the importance of integrating awakening into our daily lives, so we spend a lot of time helping to bridge the gap between the spiritual world and the relative mundane one in which we all live.
In this course we will go into detail about meditation practices, discerning thought from “reality”, how to approach long-held trauma, how to investigate and manage our fear of death, practices to stimulate deep non-dual insights, and how to avoid many different pitfalls and egoic traps that you might encounter on the awakening path.
For those who are familiar with our The Awakening Curriculum and Unfettered Mindfulness YouTube channels, you might have already seen many of these videos. But they have been assembled in a practical sequence that allows progressive insights and practice, and they have been expanded with 50,000 words of written summaries, extrapolations, further inquiry and meditation practices, and more. It’s effectively like having a whole book integrated into the video material. Even if you have already watched the videos, we hope that these written lessons will help to deepen and expand your understanding of the material, and provide you new directions to take your practice.
To get the most out of this course, we recommend watching each video in sequence, and taking lots of time to actively do every inquiry at least once. It can help to do the same inquiry multiple times before moving on. It’s always recommended to rewatch lessons, if not immediately, then come back to them weeks or months later to see if you now hear something that you missed the first time, or that now makes sense to you in a way that you couldn’t access previously.
It should be emphasized, you might accumulate a lot of new concepts from this course, but that will be of comparatively little benefit next to the insights that you glean from putting everything you hear into practice.
You are likely here, doing this course, in order to experience some sort of transformation of experience. But concepts have limited ability to do this. At least not in terms of creating long-term transformation.
For that, you need to have an experiential understanding of what we are pointing to. So relax, settle in, take a deep breath, and allow the experience to unfold all on its own.
No one knows what will happen on the other side of any practice. So remain curious, open, and remember to have fun.
